Mom Guilt: Is that you?
HEYYY FRIENDS! Long time no chat!
But seriously! I know it has been a minute but lets chat mom guilt! We all have it. It is exhausting! It is mentally and physically draining. How do we ignore it? How do we let go and let God? We don’t! We can’t we cant physically do it because we are mothers and our hearts are too big to let that go.
When I first planned my trip to Grand Cayman with my people I WAS EXSTATIC. A vacation where I don’t have to make decisions, I get to shower and sleep alone! That is what dreams are made of right? WRONG! All of a sudden I had this terrible feeling. I am giving up four days with my son. I already give up 50% of my time with him. How selfish can I possibly be? I want to take a vacation and leave him behind. What kind of monster would do that? How could I just leave my son and go have fun? What will people think? What will his dad think? What will my in laws think? …………STOP!
IT DOES NOT MATTER! My son is loved and cared for! Why am I letting the outside opinions of others who might not even have those opinions get to me. Why am I beating myself up that I want to take 6 days to myself. Where I do not have to share my bed or share the shower and I get to pee in piece. I get to eat a hot meal and enjoy my cocktail by the pool. Why do I feel guilty that I want to go to a pool and not have to swim and play? Why have I let society dictate my feelings and why are they are they making my anxiety ten times worse about leaving.
I can hear my mother now……”Oh my gosh! You are fine!” How do I get that mentality? I am fine. Elliott is fine! He is so lucky to have two parents who love him so freaking much it hurts our souls. So yes! That is the blog post. Take the trip for you soul. Whether you are a single momma or happily married leaving our babies is never easy! BUT NEEDED! My soul needs this alone time to decompress and regroup and enjoy my life. I need to remember who I am. I am not just mommy, mom, momma, poop head. I am Jessica. I am fun. I deserve happiness. I deserve time to myself. We deserve TRUE self care and time to reconnect with ourselves.
And let this be a reminder to anyone who thinks these terrible things about moms or dads or anyone who needs a moment to reconnect with the adult world…..you are an awful human for judging anyone!
